thoughts of freedom
by deliriousnight
Summary: TenTen and Neji throughout the years. NejiTen. Spoilers for chapter 614.


"_Father, is a person's destiny a thing like a cloud flowing with an inescapable flow? Or can a person choose the flow he wishes… I still don't know the answer to this. Either way the destination may be the same in the end. However by choosing to live like the latter, a person can live and strive towards a goal. And in this match I have finally understood those who have that are truly strong. Father, I have but one goal, I want to become stronger… Enough not to lose to anyone… That's how I feel. Father, the birds are flying freely today… They look so happy._"

-Neji Hyuuga

* * *

TenTen met Neji Hyuuga when she was four.

She had stumbled upon a training ground after being separated from her parents at a festival. Her kimono, which had once been a soft green with brown swirling patterns on it, clean and tailored to perfection, was now muddy and tattered at her feet. The rips that had formed there had her lifting it up at her waist to keep from tripping. She hopped along in the darkness, unsure of where she was going but not caring all that much.

A sobbing sound drew her to a place beyond the bushes. She had never been to the training grounds before, but she knew of their existence-her parents had told her as much.

But they had never told her about boys with long brown hair who had tears running down their cheeks and falling to the ground. His back was to her and the only reason she knew he was a boy was because his voice was slightly lower than hers as he cried.

Then he stood up abruptly and turned around. For a moment, TenTen thought he had sensed her eyes on him. But he didn't look in her direction at all, just stared at the sky. It was only then that she saw his face. His eyes were opaque and there was a green mark on his forehead.

She didn't think it suited him very much.

What did suit him was the straightening of his back, how he looked after he wiped away his tears, strong and proper, like a true warrior.

If he was a future-ninja, TenTen couldn't help but think, she wanted him on her team.

* * *

She got her wish eight years later. When she had walked to the field to meet her new team, she was a bit freaked out to find a man in a green jumpsuit, raring to go. Lee was only a little better, but she knew it was only a matter of time, with the way his eyes worship-fully followed their new sensei around. And then she saw Neji sitting on a bench, staring at the two hyper teammates and frowning.

Smiling, she sat down next to him. "Hi," she said. "My name is TenTen, what's yours?" Even though she knew, of course she knew. He didn't look at her but she heard him murmur it irritably to her. Smiling more widely she kicked her legs back and leaned against the table. "Interesting team we got here, huh?"

"Huh," he repeated thoughtfully.

And just like that, they had formed a sort of camaraderie.

* * *

When she had known Neji long enough to speak to him on a daily basis, TenTen realized that he hated his family. He hadn't told her as much, but whenever they walked past anything associated with his clan, he would shoot whatever-it-was a glance full of contempt. Curious as to why this was, TenTen asked her sensei since, despite being such a weirdo, Gai knew things that nobody'd credit him for knowing.

He told her the story in a surprisingly somber tone. It made her think of the day she saw him crying all those years, trying his best because he didn't even think he had anyone to be strong for except himself.

"We'll be his strength, sensei," she declared decisively.

A large blinding, white smile appeared on Gai's face as he agreed.

* * *

The next year, they qualified for the Chuunin Exam. Lee was ecstatic, TenTen was smug, and Neji was agitated.

She managed to figure out that it was because his cousin was entering, as well as the Uchiha survivor.

"I hate her," Neji told her. "And he is too caught up in his pride and his grief. They aren't worthy."

She thought that the latter could've easily applied to Neji as well, but TenTen didn't say anything.

* * *

Neji got angry for Lee's sake during the Forest of Death and TenTen couldn't have been prouder. She knew that he said he wasn't scared fir Lee himself, just the chance that they would be disqualified but TenTen chose to believe the gentle hands he used as he helped her treat Lee.

Neji beat Hinata in the third round of the Exam. It gave TenTen cimplicated feelings. After all, Hinata didn't seem the person he should've taken all his pain out on. And the destiny speech he gave wasn't the best either.

When he was done with his match, she looked at him and simply asked, "Were you born with such strength that you could knock other people down and not even feel it?"

He didn't talk to her for awhile after that.

* * *

He fought Naruto in the finals, and by the end, TenTen thought that Neji had finally stopped hating people who didn't deserve it and begun to concentrate on what actually mattered, the family he had now. Sensei, Lee, and her.

* * *

They first kissed when they were 15. It had been on a mission, when they were tailing a target and had to hide in plain sight. So Neji hid. His tongue inside her mouth. Not that she particularly minded. TenTen had waited years for him to take the hint and he finally had. Even if it was only for a mission.

They didn't talk about the kiss for a very long time.

* * *

She mentioned it again when they were 17. She was training for her Jounin Exam and he was helping her and she just managed to blurt it out. "So, I know it happened two years ago and all but...the kiss? That we had?"

He threw a kunai at her and she dodged easily. He nodded approvingly and she beamed before releasing a torrent of weapons.

"We're ninja, TenTen. We have a duty to fulfill and it doesn't have space for something like a relationship."

She didn't take offense in his harsh words; she was used to his conservationism by that point. She just nodded, as if he had said exactly what she expected. "Ninjas also make deals, don't they? On missions and stuff? Since we have to be diplomatic."

He eyed her suspiciously, spinning around every weapon she threw at him. "Yes."

"Then what if I make a deal with you?" she suggested. "If I pass the Jounin Exam, then you'll at least consider it."

He grudgingly agreed when she caught him off guard and pinned him to a tree with a shuriken.

* * *

Neji died before he could keep his promise. He died protecting the cousin he once hated, doing exactly what his father had done. Dying to protect the people he loved. The mark on his forehead was gone, TenTen saw when she was making preparations for his funeral.

The dreaded mark was gone.

And TenTen knew that Neji was up there somewhere, spreading his wings and flying free.

* * *

"_Father, I finally understand your feelings… The freedom you felt when you chose to die to protect your friends…_"

-Neji Hyuuga

* * *

**notes: This made me so sad and I had to write something for it. It's not anything big and it may not connect very well but there it is.**


End file.
